Letting The Scale Go: Mission Self Love

How do you feel about your weight? I mean the number on the scale. For the last 5 years, I have been on an off and on weight loss journey. It’s been over 5 years now and I have still not reached my “goal weight” no matter how hard I tried. It’s driving me nuts so I’m ready to nip that in the bud before it escalates. 

I haven’t always been this way. As a little girl, I was pretty thin and lanky. I wasn’t the child who ate too much either. I was very active and so there really wasn’t enough room for me to “grow”. This remained through my teen and pre-teen years. In fact, I remember one occasion where one of my aunts was giving me tips on how to gain weight. I was 12 at the time and she was advising me to eat smaller portions frequently rather than binge eat 3 times a day like we typically did. 

As I morphed into adulthood and got embraced the American society, I became aware of my body. I realized my belly wasn’t flat enough and my thighs seemed bigger than I’d love them to be. Still, I never really cared about how much I weighed on the scale. I just wanted flatter abs and that was it.

Eventually, I became conscious of that number on the scale when I realized I weighed 140 lb ish. That seemed like a super high number to me. Granted I still looked fairly lean, wearing a medium in junior clothing (I didn’t start buying women’s sized clothes until 2 years ago). At the back of my mind, 140 was just a high number. I honestly just wished I weighed less. 

Being obsessed with what I weigh on the scale is detrimental to my overall well-being. I am constantly being overly conscious of how I look and stressing over everything I eat. This is quite unhealthy. I do not have an eating disorder or anything of that sort but constantly stepping on the scale and aiming to weigh 125 and below 130 just doesn’t seem healthy to me anymore. I particularly hate the feeling of disappointment that comes with weighing yourself and realizing that you didn’t meet the set goal for that period. 

Now, if you’re on a serious weight loss journey, perhaps the scale is good to keep you on track. This post is for me, currently weighing 151 lbs and wanting to get back to the time when I weighed 130 and below. I am a pretty muscular person and do not look like I weigh over 130 so it makes no sense that I’m so obsessed with this number thing.

This number thing is particularly tough for someone like me who loves food. I find myself deprived of things I love to eat and eating things I really don’t even care for. I focus less on the nutrients on a food label and more on the number of calories when I go food shopping. Moreover, it’s getting quite hard to deal with the fact that though I work out pretty consistently, the number on the scale doesn’t seem to be going down.

So today, I am choosing to let the scale and numbers go and focus more on what’s important. 

Here are more important things to focus on:

  • Ensuring that my body is being fed what it needs:. I must ensure that I am not nutrient deficient. My number one focus should be that I am healthy no matter what the number on the scale says.
  • Staying fit and heart healthy:. I will work out and engage in fitness activities for the benefits they pose to my overall health. This means less focus on working out just for the sake of losing weight.
  • Loving myself and focusing on the positives:. I must start working out and seeing food from a positive perspective. My driving force for working out and eating healthy must be because I love myself enough to want to give me the best and keep my body in good shape.
  • Understanding that my optimal fitness is much much much more important than reaching an “optimal weight”: Weight and the number on the scale will fluctuate on a daily basis. Most times this fluctuation is due to uncontrollable variables. Variables such as hormonal changes, fluid retention sleep pattern and more. It’s unfair to put myself and my body through that stress.
  • Focus on maintaining a healthy overall diet:. With the way my health has been lately, it makes so much more sense to focus on what I eat and how I obtain my nutrients. I must start focusing more on eating right all the time and eliminate the need for “cheat days” after depriving myself for days. I wrote more about my need to focus on a developing a sustainable healthy lifestyle in this Recommitting to a Healthier and Fit Lifestyle Post.

For someone who is not obese (and even if you are), your life shouldn’t revolve around the number on the scale. Aiming for good health should be the priority. You will be so much happier knowing that your goal and motivation is good health. I hope this post inspires you to focus on whats more important.

Thanks for stopping by. Let’s talk; are you or have you been obsessed with the number on the scale? Would you challenge yourself to let go of the scale? Share your thoughts in the comment box 🙂

Loves & Hearts!                                                                                                                                                         Asaake ♥

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  • I am so with you on the weight thing! I once told myself that I never wanted to weigh above a certain number. And now I am almost 5 lbs over that number. It doesn’t help when I look at charts that don’t take into account my lifestyle that tell me I am overweight. Body image is such a struggle among American women, I’ve noticed. I wish we were in a society where we valued our minds and our personalities over our image. It makes it hard to love ourselves.

  • I say throw the scale away completely ? I would use it every chance I could, but I found out how unhealthy it is for me because I have that type of personality that can get carried away with things. So rather out of sight, out of mind for me when it comes to this. Rather having the mindset of taking care of myself and being positive is the way to go ? Not always easy of course, but it is a learning process for me. Great post! Very helpful for everyone, especially young girls and women.

    • LOL I agree with you. I have discarded my scale. It was tough but I know it’s something i needed to do. And I agree! Focusing on taking care of myself, including eating healthy and staying positive. And thank you so much!

  • From such an early age, we’re taught that the numbers on the scale are super important. That’s not the case! We should be more aware of how we feel and how we cope than numbers!

  • Thanks for sharing your story with us and being so vulnerable . I’m amazed and so proud of you for changing your attitude towards your health. Whilst I haven’t struggled with looking and checking my weight, I think society and other pressure me to be skinny. Often when I go out shopping with some friends, they always mention how easy it is for me to to find clothes, or always comparing themselves to. Although I understand what they are going through, it also hurts me as well, because it’s as if they expect to stay thin and it’s impossible for me to be in their shoes.

    Even I struggle with maintaining fitness. I admit I have been quite lazy in eating healthy and maintaining a workout and healthy mind. Thanks for sharing this post and inspiring me!

    • Thank you so much! I absolutely agree with the societal pressure to be skinny. It’s just not healthy as many of us are not biologically going to be “skinny”. And thanks for sharing your perspective on being on the other side of the weight loss spectrum. We all definitely need to be sensitive to each other. I’m super glad that this post inspired you! Here’s a living healthier and maintaining a healthy and fit lifestyle. *clink’s glass*

  • Lovely post and really good attitude to take toward health. I think it’s so easy to get caught up with the number on the scale or calorie counting and it can end up being this weird form of self-punishment that involves objectifying your own body. Being healthy and kind to your body is a way better way to go, I think. So good on you!

    • I totally agree with you, Holly. I’m super excited to be on this journey. What a difference it is already.

  • Ah good luck with this, I stopped weighing myself when I got a bit obsessed years ago and honestly it’s done wonders for my mental health because at the end of the day weight doesn’t really mean anything the important thing is that you feel good and are looking after yourself! Good luck and I hope this mission of self love goes amazingly for you 🙂

    The Quirky Queer

    • The struggle to weigh myself since this post went up is so real especially since I’ve been eating very healthy and consistent with my workout. But I have to break the habit. Thank you so much, Izzy! (Ps: my nephew is also nicknamed Izzy)

  • I have been up and down with my weight in recent years, I think I’m very much range bound and fluctuate to either end depend on the point I’m at in life. I’ve been focusing more recently less on the scales and more on fitness & health (as outlined in your blog)- as well as on sculpting my overall body vs. just working towards having a flat stomach – definitely a much more well rounded & healthier approach to things! 🙂


    • The same for me girl. I’ve always been within my weight range but somehow I constantly want to remain on the lower end of the range which is where the stress comes from. Yes to focusing on better health and wellness and overall fitness!

  • I agree, good health is the most important thing and something we take for granted. I’m not obsessed about the number on the scale, I’m actually trying to gain weight so that I feel more healthy, but I am finding it quite hard to implement these tips into my everyday lifestyle. I guess its because I don’t know much about food, so I need try new recipes and get out of my comfort zone x

    Velvet Blush

    • I get you girl! I have a friend is is constantly trying to gain weight as well and i see the struggle. Trying new recipes is great! Many of us tend to be very conservative with our food choices. This is actually what i look forward to the most about going plant based… it’s the freedom to try as many things as i possibly can. It’s exciting! i hope you find a rhythm that works for you.

  • Beautifully written Asake. Whilst I haven’t always struggled with the number on the scale, I know what it feels like to weigh yourself and your heart sinks when you see the number.

    I agree with you, the goal should be optimal fitness and not just optimal weight loss. Good luck with your journey girl 🙂
    Coco Bella Blog

    • Thank you so much! I’m just glad that i’m aware of this now before it spiraled out of control. I’m super excited for this new journey.